From the monthly archives: November 2008
And so it’s the last day of November. NaNoWriMo 2008 ends today.
It’s been a bittersweet feeling since last year. Novermber always has this magic feel because of the novel writing thing. And every time November ends, there’s the “What now?” feeling afterwards. I feel that way today, but I’m also quite tired of writing which is why I haven’t written anything in addition to the story just yet, plus because I will be busy in the next weekends, but all in all, I’ll miss this rush for November.
So what did I learn this year?
- I have a story to tell. :)
- It’s hard to manage a group of Wrimos single-handedly. It’s fun, but it’s hard and tiring and expensive. But the Wrimos made everything worth it. :)
- I need to expand my vocabulary. After some time I keep on using the same words and it was frustrating.
- I still need to work on my descriptions. Like, say how can I describe a smile without using the word smile. You know?
- I need to really work on the back stories of the characters — not in full detail, but at least in better detail than the vague ideas that I have. Oh, and make sure the characters have hobbies. :P
And of course I’m doing this next year. Some things I am thinking of trying and/or will be doing:
- I will make sure there’s a beginning, middle and end before I start writing. At least it would give me an idea of where my story would go.
- As I mentioned earlier — proper character back stories! Which means I should do more observing whenever there’s an idle moment.
- Chapter outlines. I was never an outlining person, but I realized that it was really hard to go through some parts that are boring for me or at least very hard to write, so…chapter outlines should help. :P
- Read, read, read. Seriously, I need to read more books of what I want to write.
- Speaking of, I’m thinking of trying another genre next year. Like…I don’t know, Mystery and Suspense, or another shot at Mainstream Fiction…or *gasp* Fantasy! Let’s see.
- I will definitely write again even if it’s off season. I’m thinking of doing a 365 days of fiction (hence there’s me wanting a Moleskine daily planner for next year).
- I’m still thinking of Script Frenzy. Let’s see.
- I want to do some guerilla writing next year. I’ve been thinking of getting an iPod Touch (haha good luck with my expenses) because I’m not into PDAs. Of course, a notebook and a pen will do. But I still want an iPod Touch. :P
Oh, I will definitely continue writing my novel. I seriously want to finish this. But first I must do an outline for this. :D
In the meantime, I’m meeting with fellow Wrimos tomorrow, and then there’s the TGIO party on December 12, organized by Talecraft. :) And I better start on my freelance projects due on December.
So, did you join NaNoWriMo? How was your experience?
This time last year, I was busy with work and was trying to cope with my being on night shift. This time last year too, I was struggling to reach 50k for NaNoWriMo. This year, I’m on day shift, trying to cope with all the deliverables at work, and mellowing down from NaNoWriMo after reaching the finish line seven days early.
Right now I’m trying to think of the things to do in the last month of 2008 other than go Christmas shopping. Like:
- Finish all due rakets (two!)
- Upgrade my WordPress and create a new layout (musn’t forget this!)
- Go to the dentist (I’m overdue)
- Go shopping (I’m in need of clothes, seriously)
- Clean my room (long overdue too)
- Meet up with friends I haven’t seen for a long time
I know there’s more, but I just can’t think of them yet. I have a lot of things to do at work too, and December’s a short month (we’ll be off by the 24th, and will be back by January 2), so everything must be finished early. So. Many. Things.
Ah yes I’m stressing myself out again.
I was about to post something about NaNo’s end, but I’ll reserve that on the 30th. Now I’ll go back to my reading — nothing like good and comfortable home lighting to be in the mood for reading. :)
Oh, and Happy Thanksgiving!
Last night, as my friends and I were walking back to the office from Starbucks, I heard that Eastwood was playing one of my favorite Christmas songs, Home for Christmas by N Sync. Eastwood has been decorating for Christmas ever since November came and the walkways are now lined with Christmas lights and City Walk has the prettiest white trees with lights and ornaments. :) Although the weather doesn’t seem to be cooperating just yet, I can definitely feel Christmas where I work. And because of that song playing last night, I am now playing their entire Christmas album in Triskal. :D
Now that I’m sort of done with the noveling part of the year (even if my novel is far from over!), I’m starting to feel the Christmas spirit. ♥ Although this December will definitely be different and probably be a bit more stressful, I know it’s going to be fun too. :)
I’ll be filling this blog with tons of posts about Christmas pretty soon (and hopefully some short fiction too!), but for now, let’s go a bit materialistic. :D Haha. Here’s my Christmas 2008 wishlist. :D Feel free to share yours too in the comments area!
BOOKS
- The Truth About Forever
by Sarah Dessen
- That Summer
by Sarah Dessen
- Someone Like You
by Sarah Dessen
- Only Uni
by Camy Tang
- Ted Dekker Books (except for Blink, Thr3e and The Circle Trilogy)
- 45 Master Characters by Victoria Schmidt
GADGETS
- 8GB or 16GB iPod Touch (yes, I’m giving in hehe)
- Hard drive case for Luke, Western Digital Passport External HDD
- (is this a gadget?) NewWordpress theme (ooh who’s too lazy to work on one? heh)
VANITY
- Black shoes for work – low heeled, size 6-7
- White shoes for work – low heeled, size 6-7
- Black slacks for work
- Clothes for work
- Lizard Lips Lip Balm (Healthy Options)
- J/A/S/O/N Smoothing Serum (Healthy Options)
- Revlon ColorStay Active Make-Up in Buff, Sand Beige or Nude
- …or just cash/GCs to go shopping
- Free hair-straightening and hot oil session at Going Straight
- Foot spa and pedicure
OTHERS
- Bookshelf for my room
- Jansport Backpack – big enough so I can use it as an overnight bag for outings
- Moleskine Pocket 2009 Daily Diary (Black)
- Bookstore GCs (Powerbooks, National, Fully Booked, A Different Bookstore)
- Blank journals
- Pilot gTec Pens (0.4/0.3, black/purple/pink) – the more the merrier :)
- Colored pens – Staedtler or Stabilo would do
- 9″ springform pan for my cheesecakes and other cakes
- A sunflower :)
- Anything with stars
I’d include bar stools, but I’m not really interested, plus I won’t have anything to use it on so. Hehe. :D
List will be updated from time to time. :) Anyway, back to work! I still want to write the last scene of my novel to see if I can make sense of everything and have a decent ending. :D
If there’s anything I know I’m not (along with a lot of things :P), it’s being artistic. I can’t draw to save my life, except if you want me to draw stick people. I can draw landscapes, but it’s usually the kid-type of landscapes. I decided not to go for a Creative Writing major back in college because I saw the degree was Bachelor in Fine Arts, major in Creative Writing. I can’t draw anything well — even swimsuits, which if you think, is really, really easy. :| During our thesis, I’m the programmer, not the artist, and I know what I think is cute or nice or pretty isn’t really what other people see.
But being in my line of work for almost 18 months, I am plunged into the creative world. Other than the corporate banners and graphics that I had to create for my actual work, I was forced to make different kinds of announcements for work. Because of my so-called “creative” background, I became the default announcements girl for IBM Club for this year.
Talk about panic. I’m not a graphics girl! I’m a programmer! I can only do simple graphics! Not to mention my teammates are awesome designers, so talk about pressure to make a good design even if I’m so not into creating graphics. T_T
I started with this:
IBM Club Valentine’s Day Event
Which isn’t so bad, I guess. And I guess practice really makes perfect (especially when you have to make like two to three announcements every week), because I think that my designs look…well, better as time went by. Look:
Sportsfest Teaser
Movie Night Teaser – one of my favorites :D
Videoke Night
Tree Planting Teaser
Diversity Week Celebration – this wasn’t used, but I really like it
I still can’t do fancy-schmancy Photoshop designs though. :| Oh, and all the graphics used there are from sxc.hu. I love that place.
The year’s about to end and I’m seriously looking forward to passing this responsibility to someone else. Although I’d really still like to keep a bit of the work coming in since I enjoy doing it, and it helps me practice my eye for design (if there is such a thing :p).
Oh, and maybe I can still learn to draw. But maybe I’ll try that next year. ;)
Despite my wall last week and my rantings last Saturday, I managed to hit 50k last night before I slept. :) I decided to start skipping scenes already because the first date scene I wrote may be cute, but it’s getting really hard to write, and everyone’s just talking all over the place. Haha. And speaking of things going all over the place, my story is there too, and I haven’t touched a lot on the subplot (do chick lit books have subplots?), and I still don’t know what my ending would be. I think my two protagonists really have this thing for each other, but I have never written anything where the two people would get together in the end, so it’s kind of foreign territory for me. I want to leave things hanging, open to interpretation and all that.
Oh and I realized that Ruth’s dates are always on dinner times, so I’m guessing she will go fat at the end of the novel, unless I make her metabolism go fast (haha), or get her some best diet pills. Or, I better just define the other things she does so there’s more variety when she goes out. :D
This is my fourth year of hitting 50k, but I don’t want to stop here. I actually want to finish this novel, so I will be continuing to write even if I’ve reached the prescribed word count goal. My personal goal is 60k, so I’m still 9500 words away. Eeep!
Anyway, I better get ready for work. :) Here’s the fourth excerpt for this week. This is an exaggerated case of a jealous ex. :D I have a feeling I did not really convey Ruth’s fear but what the heck. I’ll do edits next time.
Where did the third week of November fly to? One minute it’s Monday, the next it’s already Saturday. Why did my past week feel so busy? Let me see…
- We’re doing some website migrations at work and I was in charge of one country that has THREE languages. Good grief. It was actually quite easy but very, very tedious, and I honestly felt lost every now and then.
- Meeting last Wednesday which was fun, but got me packed with things to do again which I did not get to finish by Friday. Guess who’s cramming on Monday morning!
- Mother’s birthday on Thursday, and we got home very late and very full from dinner. Heaven and Eggs is a good place to eat but I don’t think I will ever eat there again.
- Friday – the day when all work suddenly poured in. What is it with work getting in the way on a Friday?! I managed to finish almost everything, so again I say, guess who’s cramming on Monday. 8-|
To top it off, I haven’t written as much as I can this week. You know how when the story starts getting boring? I think I just hit that. From the wall last week to just plain boredom this week. Or maybe I’m just busy. I’m seeing my characters wanting to do things, but I don’t know if I have the words to write them down. Maybe it’s the internal editor again, maybe not. Sometimes I feel like I’d rather browse around and look at Rimowa luggage than write. :|
Maybe the story’s becoming too personal. Or maybe, I just have to get out of the sequence and just plunge into the parts where I think would be better to write now.
Anyway, this is an entirely boring blog entry too. I should get back to writing already, even if no one shows up for this write-in. :P Haha. Wish me luck!
I realized a few days ago (while I’m all so down about my novel) that I hardly have posts in my blog that are in the In His Steps category. I can post book reviews, novel updates and even things about wireless security systems, but this category has been long quiet. It’s been a long time since I wrote something related to my faith, and I kind of miss it.
So how have I been?
It’s been…difficult. Not difficult that I can’t bear it type of difficult, but just difficult that I don’t really know what I’m doing. I don’t know where my spiritual life is going, I don’t know how I’m going to fix this. I’m not having a faith crisis, as far as I know…it’s just that everything feels like it’s in limbo.
You know how easy it is to fall back into the world and not remember who you are and whose you are? It’s kind of like that. I admit that I haven’t been exerting that much effort into my faith as much as I do before. I still go to mass, and I do my best to go to mass every first Wednesday and first Friday. I’ve had “God” moments too — moments that I feel enlightened, that I feel that He is talking to me. I try my best to revive my prayer time, to pray the way I used to back in college, where the first thing I hold when I woke up is my Bible. Right now…it’s just not the same.
Sometimes I’m scared that I’d get used to this thing, this limbo. I’m scared of not feeling scared of me losing this “battle”. I’m scared of the possibility of getting used to God not being near, to see Him as Someone I’ll run to when I need Him, not someone I need like the air I breathe. I don’t want that to happen. I can’t lose Him.
I still don’t know what I’m going to do, but I am taking baby steps again. It’s me being stripped of all my ideas about faith once again to start anew. Cliche as this may sound, this is a journey, and God values what happens in the journey. So…as a baby step, I finally did something about this limbo last weekend.
I went to confession. After one and a half years. :)
It’s a start, right? I’ve got a long way to go, and by God’s grace, I’ll get to where He wants me to be.
God wants you to understand that it is a life off aith, not a life of emotional enjoyment of His blessings…Faith by its very nature must be tested and tried. And the real trial of faith is not that we find it difficult to trust God, but that God’s character must be proven as trustworthy in our own minds. (Oswald Chambers)
After flying high the first two weekends of November in my novel…I hit the wall.
Roland/xrecent said it well from yesterday’s write-in said it well: the wall is big and scary because you don’t know what is happening at the other side. In Chris Baty’s words last 2004:
You’ll know you’ve hit the Wall when you start thinking that the whole endeavor is futile. When you start worrying that you don’t have the time or imagination to pull it off, and you come to see your story as an unmitigated disaster that should be put out of its misery before the thing gets old enough to remember where you live.
And I’ve been hitting it a lot the past week — talk about being caught in a total Week 2 slump.
It started with my MC’s crying mode last week. I managed to write a better chapter but it was still terribly boring, and hard to write. I thought that would be okay, but then when I started on the next chapter, I was stumped. What happens now?
It was annoying. And then my internal editor decided to show up, and it keeps on telling me how flat my writing is and how emo everyone has become and how I approached it wrongly and how I should just start from the very first part and write again and not think of finishing the entire story this month. I tried to look for some dares and prompts (like including Plum trees in the novel even if there are no plum trees there) but none worked. Yesterday it told me my build up was too slow, and I should have just plunged in and that I really did not know my characters at all…and it really drove me crazy. I wondered if the story was even worth telling at all.
So last night, after being so frustrated with what I’ve been doing, I took another break. I took a shower and thought of how to approach things in the story. I always get my best ideas in the shower and I really hoped to get it then. Slowly, as I rinsed off the shampoo, I found some glimmer of new ideas inside my head, another way to approach the story.
And today I wrote.
I’ve managed to hit 38k already, and I’m still writing along steadily. I do hope I can get through this particular rough patch, and get to the exciting parts (which I honestly still have no idea how to write). I think I’ll be doing some outlining in my spare time soon.
Anyway, before I go to bed today so I can start early tomorrow for some early morning writing, here’s one of the versions of Chapter 7, which I don’t know if I will be able to include at all. It was slightly fun to write though, even if I think it absolutely sucks. :P
So I was flying high with writing the past few days until I reached Chapter 7. This is where my character told me she wants to juggle (so I let her) and then in the middle of the chapter, she bursts out crying.
WHAT THE.
The scene was a “poor baby” moment, the day after Ruth finds out that her crush is not who she thought he was. She woke up with a hangover, and then her friends and her sister catch her juggling (yes, she juggles to relieve stress) and so everyone went on “comfort Ruth” mode. It was supposed to be the scene where she gets convinced by her friends to start dating, and she expresses some of her initial fears. At some point during the chapter, her best friend asks her how she is, and then she cries. SHE CRIES!
That was surprising. She’s not supposed to cry until somewhere later in the novel!
I finished the chapter yesterday but then I got stuck. I couldn’t move. The tone of the novel started going emo, and I suspect the premature tears caused it. And there’s still supposed to be some wacky stuff happening in the next few chapters and suddenly her crush became the main guy. If I continue with what I wrote, I would have to make him reappear, so where would my two other guys go?
ARGH. I so wanted to delete that chapter yesterday. I wanted to edit it…so I added some words to see how it would go but it just turned out even worse. *headdesk* And it’s like the biggest Nano sin if you edit during the month, but I so want to edit! But no no no no no.
The solution?
I write an alternate chapter.
Okay, that may be cheating…but it’s not re-writing. I’m just writing the chapter in a different way, without any reference to the first version of the Chapter 7 I initially wrote. A less emo chapter.
Okay, I’ll definitely put the juggling in there. That’s just too fun not to write.
So welcome to the suckage that is Week 2 in NaNoWriMo. I’m tempted to take a break, but I don’t want to. Unless nothing hits me today, then I will probably take a break. Hopefully, I don’t have to because I really don’t want to abandon this novel and not finish it. I want to break to 30K tonight, and then maybe I’d rest. :P
I love my story too much to abandon it. And I love that my characters are actually moving on their own. Sometimes they do too many things (like cry for instance), but that just means they’re living. I won’t be surprised if my character decides to buy some promotional bags for herself (but I won’t let her…unless absolutely necessary).
Somehow all these talks make me think of Jasper Fforde books. How characters get formed and how stories go and all that. Interesting.
Anyway, I’m off to lunch and get some more plotting done. :D Hopefully some of these ideas make it into my screen. :) Happy writing!
So here’s the second weekend and I finally broke into 20,000 words. I want to reach 25k before I sleep tonight, but as luck would have it, I have some other writing assignments that I need to finish. I have 12 reflections due for Didache 2010 next week, and to be honest, I wanted to write them all this weekend but it was impossible. I was too distracted. :( I’d rather write my novel, you know? But I must finish this.
So now I’m alternating between writing those reflections and my novel. You know when both is equally important?
I think it might be my last year for Didache. I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it. Or prayed about it. >_>
Anyway, writing the novel has been really fun. Week 2′s coming, but it’s supposed to be the hard week, but so far I’m not seeing any hard writing days yet. I want to start fleshing out the subplot with Ruth’s sister, but it’s not rearing its head, so I will go continue where my characters want me to go. Ruth’s gone speed dating and met Matt, reconnected with Ian and now she’s about to find out something about Glenn. And finally, Ruth is going on dates! I will finally make her go on a date with the guy who will ask her to buy term life insurance! I feel like I rambled for the first six chapters, but it feels just right to build up to her forced dating spree. Whee. This is the fastest progress I’ve had so far. :D I might just reach 60k. :D
I better get back to writing my reflections. :D And before I go, here’s an excerpt from Chapter 5:
