All posts by Tina

Big, Fun and Scary Things, Dear Diary

At the 8K Mark

[Cross-posted from my Tumblr]

The 8K Mark

Believe deep down in your heart that you are destined to do great things.

If you have told me that I would be running 10 kilometer races last year, I would have laughed. I was never the sporty kid, and the only way I lost all the extra weight I had was because of gym time and exercise. I never liked sports.

Then I decided to try something new this year, and running races was one of them. I thought I’d be doing 5k until the end of the year, but after an impulsive moment, I started doing 10k and never looked back.

Of course, I have only ran 4 times this year, so I can’t say that I am a great runner. I can’t say that running loves me, but I think I am starting to love running (even if my legs and knees tell me otherwise, especially post run).

Today I broke my first personal record for my 10k race. Official results will be out in the next few days are out, and my time is: 1:15:12. That’s about two minutes less than my first real 10k! The idea that I was able to run better, faster this time (despite having only 2 hours of sleep — don’t do this, kids!) is enough to make me giddy. :)

And it helped a lot that I made sure to pray while running the race. :) Awesome God, indeed.

Now my 2 hours of sleep are catching up — I’ve been awake for almost 20 hours already. Till the next run! (Adidas King of the Road, October 24! Who wants to come with? :P)

* * *

Proper race post to follow in the next few days, after the PhotoVendo pics go up so I have actual running pictures! :) Right now I better get ready for work, and put some moisturizer on my hands because its strangely dry, and I don’t want that to end up as eczema.

Have a great week everyone. :)

In His Steps

Taste and See

Psalm 34.

Whenever this Psalm comes up in my prayer time, I am always left in awe. I remember my parents used to sing one song that was based on this Psalm, but I never memorized it. It wasn’t until thesis time, when I was freaking out at the dorm, when a friend sent me this Psalm to encourage me.

The basic message of this Psalm is God is good. Taste and see God’s goodness. He is a good God, and He will not leave me, and because of that, I will praise Him. It’s such a simple and beautiful Psalm that it always takes my breath away and my heart brims with thanks with the affirmation that this Psalm brings.

I may not be able to go online again until tomorrow to blog, chat and look at apidexin reviews because I’ll be spending the night in Ortigas for our 10k run tomorrow, so I’m leaving you with this Psalm. :)

Psalm 34 (The Message version)

1 I bless God every chance I get; my lungs expand with his praise.

2 I live and breathe God;
if things aren’t going well, hear this and be happy:

3 Join me in spreading the news;
together let’s get the word out.

4 God met me more than halfway,
he freed me from my anxious fears.

5 Look at him; give him your warmest smile.
Never hide your feelings from him.

6 When I was desperate, I called out,
and God got me out of a tight spot.

7 God’s angel sets up a circle
of protection around us while we pray.

8 Open your mouth and taste, open your eyes and see—
how good God is.
Blessed are you who run to him.

9 Worship God if you want the best;
worship opens doors to all his goodness.

10 Young lions on the prowl get hungry,
but God-seekers are full of God.

11 Come, children, listen closely;
I’ll give you a lesson in God worship.

12 Who out there has a lust for life?
Can’t wait each day to come upon beauty?

13 Guard your tongue from profanity,
and no more lying through your teeth.

14 Turn your back on sin; do something good.
Embrace peace—don’t let it get away!

15 God keeps an eye on his friends,
his ears pick up every moan and groan.

16 God won’t put up with rebels;
he’ll cull them from the pack.

17 Is anyone crying for help? God is listening,
ready to rescue you.

18 If your heart is broken, you’ll find God right there;
if you’re kicked in the gut, he’ll help you catch your breath.

19 Disciples so often get into trouble;
still, God is there every time.

20 He’s your bodyguard, shielding every bone;
not even a finger gets broken.

21 The wicked commit slow suicide;
they waste their lives hating the good.

22 God pays for each slave’s freedom;
no one who runs to him loses out.

Have a great weekend everyone. Taste and see God’s goodness! :)

Dear Diary, Entertaining Angels

Brain Implosion

I watched Inception earlier with some friends earlier, and my reaction after the movie?

My brain just imploded.


Yes, brain implosion is actually possible, thanks to a movie that basically played with minds and dreams. I enjoyed it because it was almost literally mind blowing, except all I wanted to do after the movie was sit and mull over the entire thing. I want to try to make sense of it, but my brain was having a hard time keeping up.

I liked it. I think it was genius writing, and I wonder how Nolan developed his story.

Oh, and I especially liked the idea of the idea in Inception. Ideas are very powerful, and once an idea is planted in someone’s mind, it hardly goes away once it gains roots. Ideas can be good or bad, so sometimes, we have to guard our minds from the wrong ideas, and it’s just like how some of the characters learned how to guard their minds against extraction. In a way, we also have to guard our minds against the wrong ideas, or at least, pray for enough discernment to figure out which is wrong and which is right.

In a way, it’s almost like guarding your heart — you have to know which is right and wrong before they can root into your heart. If it’s right, and if it’s from God, your heart will grow. If not, then it won’t.

Okay, that’s just like me to connect this to heart stuff, right? :P

I think I should get to bed. Rest/last training day tomorrow using the fitness equipment at the gym, then race on Sunday! Happy Saturday, world. :)

Techie Geek

Gadget Wants

It is back. With a vengeance. Almost.

What is back,exactly? Something that my wallet fears, very, very much — gadget wants.

Sometimes I want to deny that I am a techie, that I’m not one who falls and gets excited over every new gadget that comes out in the market. I don’t fall over and I don’t always want a gadget, but when I find something I like? Oh dear. I won’t stop thinking about it until (a) I buy it or (b) I find too many flaws to it that I end up not wanting it.

Guess what happens most often. :|

So I guess I am a techie. Not a hardcore techie, who wants and can afford to upgrade their gadgets ever so often, but I can’t deny myself of my gadgets, and I can’t deny that I love them and often find myself thanking them for the convenience they bring. I try not to be dependent on them, but I like having them because of that. Did that make sense?

In no particular order, here are the gadgets I’ve been looking at and wanting.

Panasonic Lumix DMC-LX3

It hit me a couple of months ago that my Canon IXUS 80, Ashley, is getting old. She’s turning two this year, and while it’s still working properly, I know it’s having a hard time already. And that’s coming from me who hardly takes pictures nowadays. I talked to my brother about it, and said that most of my pictures are blurry already, and maybe it’s time to get another camera. He suggested the Panasonic Lumix DMC-LX3.

It isn’t as pretty as Ashley, but this has a lot of good camera reviews. I know this isn’t the latest model (I stopped researching about digital cameras after some time), but I know this model is one of the good ones. My gadget lust for a new camera faded over the months, so I am in no hurry to buy this…but I know I’ll have to replace my camera sometime. Ahh.

Canon Powershot D10

Canon Powershot D10

I only wanted this because of its underwater capability. I was so envious with this other group of people at the airport on our way home from Coron, and they had videos of their snorkeling adventure. I still want this, because underwater camera cases are expensive (at least, the good ones are), but I’m not in a hurry because I’m not going snorkeling anytime soon.

And besides, it’s not like I take photos of everything. I’m probably the laziest camera-toting person whenever my friends and I go out. Most of the time my camera is just inside my bag. :P So enough with the cameras (for now).

Amazon Kindle 2

I blogged about this in my book blog, and I’ve been thinking about getting this since the price went down my friend told me about her experience using it. I started wanting this the same time the iPad went out, but since I thought the iPad is just a luxury item, I wanted the Kindle more because it fits a bookworm like me. Then I started getting books from the Kindle store ever since Mina’s Fairy Tale Fail came out, so the gadget lust continued.

I’m not lusting after this anymore because…I just ordered my Kindle a couple of days ago. With a pink case.

Of course a new Kindle version is released for pre-order a couple of days after I order. Hmph. Then again, even if there are new versions available, it won’t get here on time for my mom to go home, plus…well, this is still a good buy, regardless of the version. As long as it can still read books, I don’t think I’d mind.

It’s a good thing I like white gadgets. The smaller size looks nice, though, but I don’t think they have a case for it yet.

Nokia C3

Speaking of pink.

Nokia C3

I’m going to channel that little girl from Despicable Me right now just to say this: It’s so pink I’m gonna dieeeee!

I first saw this phone on Jayvee’s blog and immediately fell in love with the pink-ness. Thing is, I don’t need a new phone, I just got myself one last November after Captain Tal died. I’m not one who carries two phones (I don’t like having more than one number — I tend to forget about the other one). I really, really don’t need this.

But oh my gosh, the pink. I want it for the color! Is that justifiable? My phone has more features than this one, save for the QWERTY and Wifi…but it is not pink! The PINK!

You know what’s even more enticing now? Nokia is having a one day promo sale on July 31 for this model — Php 1000 off! The phone is only Php 6295!!! Ahhhhh.

I want. I don’t need, but I want. I think I can afford it, but is it justifiable? :-s

* * *

Ah the things we want and we need. It’s actually a good thing I’m single and I’m only spending for myself (with the semi-regular treats for my family). I don’t know if that reason justifies my gadget lust…but at least I can enjoy my hard-earned money.

Now the question is…do I give in to this gadget wants? Especially for the pink?

Dear Diary

What I've Been Doing

This is what I’ve been doing for the past few days:

  • Read.
  • Work.
  • Read.
  • Wheeze.
  • Read.
  • Read.
  • Read.

What a life, right? Well, okay, half the time I’m working and the other half I’m doing other household stuff, but for every other free time, I’m holding a book or reading an ebook. I would gladly skip a chance to play on an xbox 360 to read some books — how geeky is that? It’s no wonder my book blog is more active than my personal blog.

Truth be told, I’m having a hard time thinking of things to write here. It would have been easy if I were a travel bug and I’ve been going wherever and all, but I’m not. My life is pretty boring lately, so I feel like there isn’t anything much to blog about. I can’t keep on blogging about work and whatever it is that I do because believe me, it’s not interesting.

See, what can I write about?

Sometimes I wonder if I should just kill this blog and get it over with.

But I can’t.

Another 30 days? Do I have to make a 30 day challenge every month to get this blog going? Maybe I should have a new layout for the site so I would be motivated to blog?  There has to be something. Any ideas?

Dear Diary, In His Steps

One Down

I’m okay. So this is what Basyang did to us last night, as well as some thoughts:

  • I got off work about 15 minutes to 1 in the morning, and met my brother and his girlfriend at CBTL. I had to cross a very dark Eastwood street, feel the wind whip me all around (not really that bad), and then when we were about to go, we saw that we can’t get out of the Citywalk parking lot because the parking ticket booth fell over and they can’t bill us properly for the parking. Pfft. I felt kind of guilty for going home late, and thought we’d be stuck there all night. Good thing they let us go.
  • The ride home was scary. Dark and scary. Remind me never to attempt to drive home if it’s windy and dark like that, unless I am a very good driver already. Which I am not.
  • Slept at home in the dark with the windows open, so it was cold. I prayed the rosary all night to calm my nerves, and well, God was faithful even if I am not.
  • Let me repeat that: God is faithful, even when I am not. Thank You, Lord, for protecting us.
  • I promise to clean my room this weekend.
  • I also promise to start fixing a typhoon emergency kit. And such.
  • Our dog, Batman, freaked out like I did, and he looked thinner this morning. :( Aw poor doggie.
  • Everything was okay in the morning, thank God. And don’t you think it’s funny how bright everything is after a storm? Again, God is faithful, even when I am not.
  • Dark Eastwood is scary Eastwood. Boo. But all things are okay now, I think?

What perked me up today? Other than Flaming Wings with my teammates, and Looking for Alaska by John Green (I’m sorry, I couldn’t resist!), it’s this:

Ben and Jerry's Peanut Butter Cup
Ben and Jerry's Peanut Butter Cup - so sinful but so yummy.

Oh dear.  Ben and Jerry’s in Shopwise Libis is the best discovery I had this week, and probably the most sinful. If I keep on eating this, I might need to take some apidexin! Ack! That, or run and run and run. Anyway, so I think the storm is over. I hope I get enough breathing room before the next one comes. Please Lord? And before I go, I leave you with this quote from Lie to Me S02E10:

So sometimes, when there’s nothing you can do, you just have to believe that everything’s gonna be okay…and you write a song. You can’t be worried and write a song at the same time, right?

Well in my case, it’s to write a blog. :P I’m okay. I hope you are, too. :)

Dear Diary, In His Steps

Scared Senseless

Hello typhoon season.

I just have to let this out: I. Am. Scared.

Oh dear Lord, I never thought I’d be this afraid of this. I mean, I was okay by the end of the year, and I had a long time of peace without storms and lots of sun and all that, and I thought I’d be ready for the typhoon season. But now that Basyang is here and the wind is howling and there’s rain, and there’s power outages and all that…I’m just scared. Aren’t there some kind of vitamins that I can take to take the fright off?

Oh dear Lord. Still my heart. I claim that there will be no more floods, and we will be safe, but I can’t help but keep on checking the weather, I can’t help but keep on tracking the storm, I can’t help but be scared and remember what happened in September last year. I prayed, and I claimed that it wouldn’t happen again, and I know God is protecting us, but I can’t help but feel scared.

Go away, fear. I don’t need you.

And just my luck, all the songs I used to listen to are not in my iPod, and I can’t seem find calm and be still. I’m seriously freaking out. And this is just one typhoon — I know there is more coming this year! I should be used to it, I should be okay with it, but I feel like breaking down and crying right now. I just want it to stop. I don’t know if I can take it for every single typhoon that comes here, one or two or three could hit Metro Manila and could pour rains all over, and…I can’t keep freaking out for each one. Where is that calm that I used to have?

I don’t know, maybe the flood carried it away?

Oh dear God, I’m really scared. :(

Oh dear God, please help me be still and believe in Your protection.

I remember this one reflection I wrote in Didache that got lots of replies, one that I entitled Scared Senseless. I’m reading it right now and I think I’m too frazzled to really read through it, but I hope I take those words I wrote in my heart and believe that God is taking care of me even now that I’m so scared that I don’t know what to think.

*breathes* Relax. Relax.

I will be okay. I think I just have to survive this typhoon season and I’ll be okay again. Survive the typhoon season without any disaster,I mean. and I claim there won’t be any, because God is our protector, and my brother is getting married this year. Please spare us, Lord. Please Lord. By God’s grace, I will be okay.

*breathe*

Father, please help me see You in this storms and the storms that will be coming.

But he said to them, “It is I. Do not be afraid.” (John 16:20)

Dear Diary, In His Steps

Funk

I can’t believe I’m still in this…funk.

I can really relate to this image right now:

It’s been weeks, and I still feel like I’m in some kind of funk. Like…there’s something missing, but not really. I wish I could blame PMS on this, but I just finished with my period (sorry, TMI!), and yet I’m still feeling quite…down.

Bored.

It’s so frustrating.

It’s not like I have some kind of problem. As far as I know, I don’t. I’m pretty okay with everything, but that’s just it. I’m just okay. I’m not asking for any problem of some sort, and I’m thankful my life is relatively peaceful…but I just wish there’s something else I can look forward to in the next days, weeks, months. Something big. Something exciting. Something to awaken my passion and all that shiz.

An adventure of some sort.

But alas, there’s none.

Sigh. I guess this is some kind of holding pattern once again, a waiting moment, a time where I should sit still and wait. Wait for what, exactly? I don’t know. I know it doesn’t involve any cigars, though. I wish I have some clue…but right now, I really have no idea. Is this a part of growing up, again?

Surprise me, Lord? Please give me something to look forward to.

Dear Diary

Another growing up post

Now Woody, he’s been my pal for as long as I can remember. He’s brave, like a cowboy should be. And kind, and smart. But the thing that makes Woody special, is he’ll never give up on you… ever. He’ll be there for you, no matter what.

So I watched Toy Story 3 earlier, and as expected, I cried. I didn’t cry buckets, but I shed tears, especially near the end. I mean, who wouldn’t?

No spoilers here, but I’m glad I watched the movie (even if I was alone. Then again, it was me time, so it doesn’t really matter).It wasn’t my favorite Pixar movie, but I think it’s a good one, and it’s a nice way to say goodbye to the toys. And to give a nod to growing up, which obviously all of us have experienced, are experiencing and will experience.

Lately I’ve been feeling kind of alone. I mean, I know I said I’m okay with being alone, but not alone alone. You know? I mean, I’m happy most of the time, I’m contented with where I am, but lately, I’ve been wondering: where are my friends?

I guess we’re all just busy, so it’s not that easy to see each other. That, and some friends are just out of the country. I miss them so, but it makes me wonder once again: where are my other friends?

So this is where my keeping in touch skills come in again. I’m not one who has a ton of friends who I can call and hang out with and such. I’m the person who has a group of friends who I regularly hang out it, preferably friends from different groups who I introduced to one another and made them friends, too, so it’s kind of like all connected. It’s just hard when everyone’s busy, and I feel like there’s no one to hang out with, and work is piling up and I’ve been feeling lonely and…well, sometimes, I just have to deal with myself alone, and find comfort in that even when I am sad, just the same as when I am happy.

Wait, did that make sense?

But anyway. Toy Story 3 reminded me that I am growing up. I’m way past Andy’s age. I felt the same sadness when he had to let go of the toys so he could move on, but I’m sure he won’t forget them. And I’m sure he’s happy that his toys are making someone else happy, too.

I don’t know if I have a point with this entry, exactly. I just felt like writing, to try to make sense of what I’m feeling and what I’ve been feeling for the past weeks. Maybe I’m just kind of having the blues.

Maybe I just need something new in my life. A challenge. Something to look forward to.

I don’t know. Let’s see.

But for now…I think I need to go to bed. I should have been in bed an hour ago, but look at what my thoughts did to me — I wish there were some natural sleep aids to help me to stop thinking and just sleep. Hmph. But it isn’t so bad, I guess. Tomorrow Later, I must sweat it out, and finish an article and maybe try to do some more soul-searching. Maybe I’ll find what I’m trying to look for.

Entertaining Angels

Eclipse…zzzz.

So last week, my brother, his girlfriend and I set off to watch Eclipse, after I invited them to when we dropped off our mom to the airport. I wasn’t particularly excited about it because I’ve long been disenchanted by the Twilight series. I could have chosen other movies to watch, yes, but I watched this for the following reasons:

  1. Shirtless Jacob/Taylor Lautner (I can’t deny it, he has fab abs)
  2. Everyone would be watching it

Yeah, abs and peer pressure. What a combination.

As expected, there were a lot of people in the cinema, and we managed to catch the last few seats in the cinema. For a last full show, the cinema was full, and I was wary on hearing squeals of delight all over the cinema if anything squeal-worthy comes on screen.

So was there anything squeal worthy?

NO.

I came out of the cinema two hours later thinking that it was probably the most boring movie I ever watched. I can’t say it was absolutely bad, but it was totally bland. Not even the shirtless Jacob moments gave me a reason to like it. I hate to be so judgmental of something, but I didn’t get any excited with any scene, and I didn’t know they could get worse in acting. To think Eclipse was the book I liked the most. And other people were saying Eclipse was a better movie than New Moon. It was? But why did I feel like sleeping or doing something else  while I was in the cinema?

Maybe I’ve really just outgrown the series. Maybe it’s because I’m not a fan, and most of the time, I shudder whenever I hear anything about the saga. True, I read The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner for a review, but that didn’t enhance my movie watching experience.

Maybe it’s really just not for me anymore. *shrug*

I hear Breaking Dawn will be split into two movies. I don’t think I’ll troop to the cinemas to watch it, though — I disliked Breaking Dawn, and I don’t think it will be any better on screen. :| I’d rather click here, choose another movie, or wait for the DVD. Or skip it all together. Whichever. Even if Taylor Lautner is there.

On the other hand, I sure wish they don’t murder the Flipped movie.

No offense to Twilight/Eclipse fans, just blogging my reaction (or lack thereof) to the movie. What did you think of Eclipse, though? Share in the comments. :)