Category Archives: In His Steps

Dear Diary, In His Steps

Leaps of Faith

I figure it’s time for some serious blogging, aside from reviews. I’ve been talking too much about the things I’ve watched and read lately that this is becoming a review blog.

I’m almost done with my self-imposed vacation, and I shall start my job hunting tomorrow. Well, I’ll start it on Monday, actually, since tomorrow isn’t a business day. But tomorrow, I shall fix my resume, beef up my portfolio a bit and then fix my JobStreet and JobsDB resumes as well. And then it’s work time…or at least, job hunt time.

I make it sound so easy, but you know what? I’m terrified. I still feel like a fish out of the water, a chicken running around with its head cut off. I still feel so inadequate and to think I graduated from one of the top universities in the country.

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In His Steps

On Singlehood, Love and Surrender

“I want you to live a life as free of complications as possible. When you’re unmarried, you’re free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master..the time and energy that married people spend on caring and nurturing each other, the unmarried can spend in becoming whole and holy instruments of God. I’m trying to be helpful and make it as easy as possible for you, not make things harder. All I want is for you to be able to develop a way of life in which you can spend plenty of time with the Master without a lot of distractions.”
– St. Paul, 1 Corinthians 7:32, 34-35 (The Message)

A lot of people already know about this about me, but in case you don’t know, I’m part of the “highly prestigious” club of NBSB: No Boyfriend Since Birth. I’m also the founding member of MAMS: Mabuhay Ang Mga Single, which I started Valentine’s Day 2004. I’ve pretty much been a single all my life, and I’ve never had any guy I like pay attention to me that way or at least seem to reciprocate what I’m feeling. At least, I think so.

Loser, eh? I’ve more or less accepted that. I don’t know what’s in me that does not seem to be attractive enough to make the guys I like to like me back. Or have someone like me, period. Have you ever wondered about that? If you’re in the same situation as I am, I’m pretty sure you’ve thought about that. I remember asking a friend once, during one of my emotional periods: “You told me I chose the right man…but why doesn’t the right man choose me?”

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