day fifteen.

I meant to post 23 things about being 23 years old, but I realized that…well, making a list that long is kind of hard. I’m talkative, I know, but coming up with a list like that is a bit too mentally taxing for someone who’s a bit too tired from a double class in the gym.

Or maybe I’m just lazy. Buuuut nevertheless.

In less than an hour, I’m turning 24. It feels kind of sad that the day I’ve anticipated to come since last month is finally coming, and pretty soon, it will be all over, and life would be back to normal. I know, these thoughts I’m having are depressing, but as what I talked about with Jana earlier, it’s kind of like what we feel when Christmas is over. It’s time to go back to normal.

But it’s not even the 17th yet, so I better cut these thoughts.

So. 23. How was my 23rd year? This time last year, I was in a long call, and shortly later, I was surprised by some friends, and went home feeling giddy because it was the first time I ever received a sunflower. That picture over there was me, exactly a year ago. Longer hair, and slightly more pudgy. ;)

My 23rd year was quite eventful, really, but for the life of me, I’m sort of having a hard time recalling the specific things that happened. I don’t want to bore you with that anyway, because if you want to know about that, then you can just browse through the archives. But I think, what’s more important than remembering what happened is to remember what I learned in the past year of existence, to remind me of them when I start a new year in my life.

So. Again. Twenty-three.

• This year, I learned and realized that I had very great friends. I know I used to complain a lot about how I suck at keeping in touch, or that I don’t have a solid group of friends and all…but this year, I was proven wrong. I have the most awesome friends ever. I’m so glad I reconnected with my high school friends and from seeing each other every six months, we now see each other every week! Plus, I’m so blessed that they get along with my office and college friends, so I can go out with a whole bunch of people and feel like we’ve all known each other forever. With friends like them, who needs a boyfriend? ;)
• This year, I also found out that I can make new friends if I really want to. I’m not the friendliest person around — at least, as far as I know — but now I really think I’m starting to reach out more and hang out with different sets of people and make memories with them…and none of it involves me sharing a story about a boy or a love problem, which was how I started friendships (that ultimately became acquaintances) before.
• One more about friendship. It’s also this year that it really hit me that friends really do come and go. Even if that friend was someone who I used to be really close to. I tried my best to keep the friendship alive, but a one-sided effort can only go so far. I got tired, and I was hurt, and until now, I’m still trying to let go and forgive the person. I’m still here to be a friend, but this year, I’ve made up my mind to move on and not wait for that other person to catch up with my life.
• This year, I still had a hard time praying. But I also learned that God’s love is still bigger than my weaknesses, and that He is always, always there even if I am not.
• This year, I was able to read more. And write more. I think this is the year that I was able to write more blog entries, articles and stories, even if I did experience the worst burn out in writing I’ve ever had. I definitely read more books, and I’m glad that I never lost that love of reading.
• This year, I learned that anything is possible. If I put my time, heart and if needed, money, into it, I can do it. It’s all in the discipline, and how much you want it. I know it’s vague, but the best example for this is when my weight loss — I never thought I would have been able to reach it if I didn’t put my time, heart, and yes, money, into it.
• This year, I learned to fight for my heart. If you ask me a year ago what I wanted…in a guy, specifically, I would not have been able to answer. A long night at a coffee shop with good friends made me realize that, and anything that involved matters of the heart is worth fighting for. Yes, I think I may be able to answer the question up there…but right now I’m keeping it for myself. ;)
• This year, I learned not to be too uptight. I’ve learned to relax, to have fun, to try new things even if I haven’t tried them before. Being too serious can give you adult acne, you know. There is wisdom in Yes Man, and in saying yes to things. :)
• This year, I learned to be more open to people. This is a bit love specific again, but I realized that I don’t need to be strict with the things I want in a guy. Love isn’t about similarities alone, after all, but differences as well. I may sound a bit idealistic at times, but now I’m trying to be open to other people’s quirks and traits. There are non-negotiables, of course, but for the little stuff, I’m learning to be more accepting. In addition, I also learned that my ideal situation is not what really happens in real life, and I need to stop imposing them on other people. Different strokes for different folks. :)
• One more thing about love. This year, I learned to be okay with being alone. I think this is the most important lesson I learned with regards to love life, because it relieves me of the pressure of looking for someone. I’m happy with being by myself. :)
• And finally, this year, I learned that God’s plan is wider and deeper than what I can initially see. Ondoy changed my life, but it reminded me that God’s is stronger and more powerful and bigger than any typhoon or calamity that comes. I also learned that everything that happens in life is a part of God’s will. I may not see it now, but someday it will all make sense.

I have a feeling there’s more, but I’ll stop here because I want to post this entry before 12 midnight strikes. It’s already 11:59PM — one minute till I turn 24. :) Am I ready to be older and wiser once again?